Cooking: Aging and Yes!

Having come to the realization that I am going to actually age (GASP!), I have decided to make some changes in my life. Yes I, ...the sufferer of Peter Pan  Syndrome, have acknowledged that I will not always be able to bounce back and have started really and truly, aging.


It hit me recently, I might be middle aged. Which only means I have lived half my life with just as much to go.  But, what did strike me is that I better start taking better care of myself this second half. So, I have weened myself for the most part off sugary things. I am in the process of "less grains".  Daily juicing is almost a habit (two weeks in and if I skip it, I miss it). Workouts better planned.

The cute cup and straw make me feel like it is a sassy drink

The other side of that aging coin is that "later" is here. I read a great blog by one of my dear friends cool sister. She is smart and full of life, the type of woman I strive to be, but never seem to actually be.  She started an "I Never" list of experiences.  Her log of what she did "new" inspired me to have a year of "yes". Simple in concept, but not in practice, for me.  I am a lot a little controlling, shy and a little introverted.  The unknown is hard for me. New situations take a lot of energy.  "Yes" is hard.

Dirt: I Need A Fire Lit

This was a weekend full of great achievement, for my kids. I was the supportive mom that I always strive to be. Standing all day long, on the banks of a river to watch my daughter row. I literally saw her for less than 6  minutes total. Meanwhile, I made small talk, helped feed 100 hungry teenagers, cleaned up after teenagers and acted like I felt great.

I did not. In fact, I was running a fever all day long. My back hurt, my head hurt and yes...my feet probably stunk. I smiled and cheered and made small talk with a dozen other parents to cheer on our kids. Because that is what mothers do.

Friday, I drove across town twice to pick up my other daughter and deposit her at the drop off for her sleep away retreat. Youth Trust is a big deal, as it is a great community service  program sponsored by the YMCA. She was nominated by her teachers as a leader in her school. I was thrilled. Even though with a fever, headache, backache and the knowledge that I had a 5 am wake up call, I drove her across town instead of going home to bed.

I always joke that the #momlife twitter tag is women driving someone else, somewhere far to enjoy fun they are not going to enjoy themselves.  And if you are a mom with involved kids, you know that is exactly what #momlife is all about.

I decided when I got pregnant unexpectedly, that I would be the best mom I could be. I have taken that decision very seriously. But somehow the last year has become about work and kids and not about ME. Don't get me wrong, I have tons of fun. Steve and I have a great time going out. However, I am missing the nourishing of my soul.


This is not something I just realized. But it dawned on me today as I took my daughter shopping and bought her 3x the amount of clothes than I bought myself, I am not treating myself right. Not clothes or things you can buy, but I am not treating my creative side right. I read books and I work out (not in a week and a half). That is it. What am I going to do? Not sure. But I do know I need to do something quick before I dry up and become old.

That is all for now.

Dirt: School started, again

Well,it happened.

School started. 

Despite my foot dragging and deep sighing, my wistful thinking and my child's hopefulness that it would not actually happen. School started Wednesday.

 

This is the first year we were not ready. 

The first year that I wasn't annoyed by cries of boredom. 

The first year I waited until the day before to even look at what we needed for school, much less buy a thing. We went shopping for school supplies at 2pm the day before.

 

Still, it is  nice to have them back in the swing of things. I started a new job and it is nice not to have to worry about what they are doing and try to arrange transportation and what not. 

Time marches on and they are back in school.

Exercising: Bikini or not

I am 41 years old. 

My baby sister is 36. 

We are both working out doing the same program. 

She is built like a personal trainer/cross fitter.

I am built like a 41 year old. Mom.

2 years ago...celebrating almost 40

I am loathe to blame age on our differences. Especially since I was a slug from November til March. However, it is is discouraging when I eat right and exercise. And those darn 6 pounds are still lazing around, mocking me every morning on the scale. 

I have made peace with parts of the situation. First of all, I am 41 and I can get into my jeans from when I was 26 and a slender girl. I also am really strong, especially my legs. My goal of 50 pull ups is becoming a reality. I can do 30 with the assist band on one knee. A rounder face looks like less wrinkled

via

All in all, I am okay. I worked in the yard and moved over 80 bricks today. My back feels great despite that hard labor. I pulled weeds and lifted bucket after bucket of cement and didn't bat an eye or call my husband. 

Life is good. 

Will I wear a bikini? 

More than likely, yes. 

I will just cringe when I take my shirt and shorts off and pray
that everyone knows I can wear my pre-child jeans.

Whatever: Shopping list

I need clothes.

Not need as in "I haven't shopped in days"

 but need as in

 " I have given every thing away and now I am going to be naked."

Pinterest has been my friend these past few months and now I am making a list of items I want to purchase to go along with what I have already. A plan, have I! 

Yoda, channeling am I.

Ha! 

Actually my plan is this: 

• buy a complete outfit  with items that will  go with other things I have
• buy two dresses that I can wear casually, but dress up for dinner
• buy a casual pair of fun shoes to go with shorts/dresses/jeans
• buy some tops that are statements to go with bottoms that I have 
• find two pairs of jeans (one blue and one colored) that fit 
•  

Dirt: The time, it flies

I have a love hate relationship with old photos.

 

Gratituesday: Mag Rag

I have started reading a magazine that I used to think was a little mature for me.

I actually bought a subscription to said magazine after I found myself buying it in the checkout lanes at various stores around town.

I kind of hid it under my Real Simple and my daughter's Mental Floss for awhile and then realized, that no one in my house knew what this magazine was, so I stopped.

THEN...

My sister came for Thanksgiving. She asked my daughter if I was the one who bought said magazine.

Yes, she said. Then my sister gave me the look.

You know the one. The one that says "What is up with that?"

Busted.

 

In case you are wondering the magazine is More. 

A magazine who's tag line is "Celebrates women of style and substance with articles on style, health, work, spirituality and relationships."

Whose readership's average age is 51. ( I just googled that.)

Yep, I am reading the old lady magazine.

In my defense, when I first bought it my idol Sarah Jessica Parker was on the cover.  Now, I am not one to pass up Ms. SJP on a magazine cover. After I realized what magazine it was, I was a little embarrassed. But then I bought the Salma Hayak cover and haven't looked back. 

For the record, most of the articles are exactly age appropriate for me, except there is little about the delicate dance of raising teenage daughters. Instead, it is about staying healthy physically, mentally and monetarily as we enter the second half of our lives. 

Check...I am about 9 years away from *gulp* middle age.

Also, when I was 16 and 17 I read Cosmo, and I definitely was young for that rag, for sure.

I am really grateful that I have a little bit of humility about aging.  I don't plan on getting "old" anytime soon, but I do know that the opposite of dying is aging. 

And, if I can get eating and health advice from Salma Hayak in the meantime, I am going to take it.

I am grateful for my downtime with my More magazine.

PS. I have also started reading Redbook at the gym. I may be in trouble.