Whatever: The long road to not being boring

Yawn.

Yep, I know...my blog is boring. 

I can't help it. My life is somewhat in a rut right now. 

I am working on it.

Here are some photos of the in progress boring to cool room.

We are currently looking for curtains, a lampshade and sheets.
We are going for a more grown up look, but her style is really colorful and very arty.

She will eventually fill up the remaining walls with her art.

I still have to paint the trim, but I worked a bunch this week.

Maybe I should hire my Ellie to jazz up my blog.

Dirt: Gotta brag

My daughter's swim banquet was last night. A tear was brought to my eye when it dawned on me that this was her last season as a middle school swimmer. Her lovely coach had kind words to say about her, including that she could be a real asset to the varsity team next year if she chooses to swim. 

That was a button poppin' moment. She rocked the championship and scored a fair amount of points for her team, taking almost a full minute off her 500, which is a lot in swimming.

8th graders

22 girls tried to sit around this table...that's team work

She was part of a super badass team that truly brought it. 22 girls who swam their finest all season and improved up until the very last race, outscoring their rival by over 200 points and the combined boys and girls team by over 100.  Last night we celebrated all those sweet girls aged 11-14.

 It was fun and very sweet and a little eye opening.

My husband and I sat with four other girl's parents and listened as they all complained about their daughters not talking to them anymore about anything. I was really surprised. There was a lot of " my kid never tells me anything" and "sometimes she forgets who we are and slips up and talks to us". I did not join in. My kids are pretty chatty with me. One is a little less, but if I pay attention, I know what is going on with her and most of her friends. In addition, these were "cool" parents who I know are understanding with their daughters.

 

The struggle within me it to stop trying to solve their problems as I did when they were little. My experience has led me to realize that if I keep my mouth shut and don't judge, I hear a lot more.  As someone who in her late teens realized her parents were there to help, I resolved to be like them. My step mom was the best at listening and keeping a straight face. I try to do the same. 

I have already had some pretty frank conversations with both daughters. No topic is off limits, even if it makes me uncomfortable.  The reality is that girls need adult female  supervision and examples, especially as they are becoming adults themselves. Leonard Sax talks about this in his book Girls On the Edge.  Dr. Sax suggests that teenage girls need a few close girlfriends, their mother and one or two adult women to guide them to adulthood. I am fortunate that my daughters are close to my sisters in addition to a few of the mothers of their peers.  We have limited the media in their lives, even recently cutting back on their iPad and laptop time. The reason being kids and especially girls want "the answers" and going to the internet is like going to someone's older sister who is very worldly and has no filter.

As a mom, I try to engage my girls in conversation and share my own life with them. They know my daily  struggles including trying to find my place in service to God, what I am feeling insecure about,  if I have cramps, which relationship is causing me strife, how I am struggling to workout, etc. I want them to see that the things they deal with right now are always going to be in their lives.

Coach LaRochelle

I hope the other parents were exaggerating  and were doing the things parents do in order to not seem like they are bragging about their kids. These are the best and brightest girls I know and it would be such a misfortune if their parents are missing that aspect of their lives.  Vice versa, the girls truly will be missing out if they don't allow their amazing parents to share their daily ups and downs.

Gratituesday: Following shoes

I love shoes. 

My parents called me Imelda in high school. I not only worked in the shoe department of a local department store, but I also spent a lot of my hard earned money on buying more shoes. At one point, I had over 100 pairs. 

I am not quite so gluttonous now. I have about 15 pairs of shoes, but wear only a few regularly. Running shoes, my beloved cowboy boots, a pair of Converse  my nephew bought me for Christmas, and my Rainbow flip flops which also double as my slippers are heavy in the rotation. I have a pair of black flats that I have literally almost worn out and am on the search for a pair as comfy to replace them. The rest are random shoes I wear often enough to warrant keeping, but not often enough to make the pile at the bottom of my closet.

For Christmas, I received two pairs of super cool Toms. One is more of a winter Tom and the other all season. I have worn them both once and foresee once shorts season is here, the all season  with be in high rotation with  my Rainbows.  I feel pretty cool thinking that somewhere, two people have a pair of shoes thanks to my Christmas wish and of course, Tom's famous one-for-one philosophy.

Yesterday, when I was putting my shoes away, I got to thinking about my own philosophy about giving.  Do I have one? I don't have a lot of money, so I am not ever going to be known as a great philanthropist in that sense. However, I have a lot of other things going for me. I have time, I have cool shoes and I can talk to kids.

My prayer for this year is for God to show me how I can serve Him better. This has led me to some deep reflection. Never an easy task, since I have to shut my own voice up to hear His, and I am a talker. A fill-in-the-silence nervous talker.  I, literally  have had to shut up. 

I have felt the hand of God sending me in a direction. Of course, I had to over analyze it and then get a reality check. My pride led me to think I needed to start at the top, when I really believe He wants me to start at the bottom. Giving, of my time and my self. 

So, while I wish I was as cool and visible as Blake Mycoski and could found a business as far reaching and hip as Toms, I realize I am to be a servant. God's servant and my fellow man's servant.
I am grateful to have been led, now I just need the courage to follow.

Hopefully, my shoes will take me there.

Curious?
Check back and I will share once I get the courage to take the leap.