Gratituesday: Marriage

*Gratituesday was yesterday and I was remiss in posting this on time*

A  couple that we are friends friends with are going through a divorce. 

I cannot say whether it is messy or just a divorce, as I have no experience in these matters other than my parents and I don't remember that.

The sadness that envelopes my heart when I speak to her is really heavy. He is not interested in sharing with us, and that is perfectly fine. I am not exactly comfortable with being in the middle, so to speak. But she is one of my best friends and so I am a listening ear and hopefully a comforting hand.

Steve and I like all couples, go through patches of not communicating well and not listening well. 

We are sometimes ships in the night, passing and leading our own separate lives. I can see how easy it would be to veer off course, away from each other.

Marriage is hard. 

However, we made a pact before we got married that we would work at being married. 

As children of divorce, both of us knew that it would be a hard road. That has been the beacon that has carried us through a lot of stress, arguments, tears and misunderstandings. 

The beacon is our love and our dedication to each other. The reality that we are in it together. We chose this path, hard or easy. That carries us through. 

Right now, I try to be in the moment with him. I love him so much it hurts my heart. He is funny, caring and smoking hot. And he is my partner. 

The forethought to think marriage through before we got to it has been one of the only things we have actually planned in nearly 20 years together. Everything else...seat of our pants. 

I like to think it is my most valued possession.

For that I am grateful.